Copy in possession of author. When are you going to be baptized?" 47. There are thousands of fundamentalist Mormons throughout the Intermountain West who are a constant reminder of Mormonisms polygamist past. This has led to unansweredperhaps even unspokenquestions, as well as hurt feelings, insecurity, and resentment. Peggy Fletcher Stack, Poll: Most Still Unsure about Mormons and Polygamy, The Salt Lake Tribune, September 12, 2011, accessed September 13, 2011, http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/52568348-78/mormon-mormons-polygamy-percent.html.csp. When Jesus Christ came to earth, He organized His church. What handbook are you referring to? Unfortunately, she was not alone in being shocked to learn Joseph Smith had plural wives. 16. 8. Elder Scott's parents would later serve in the Washington DC Temple for many years, and Elder Scott served as an apostle until he passed away Septemeber 22, 2015. Let's try this: the First Presidency must approve of all people who are called as Bishop. So if you were born to your parents after they were sealed in the temple (born in the covenant) or were sealed to them in the temple yourself, you are still sealed to themboth of themeven after a divorce. As President DieterF. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency, taught: We must let go of our grievances. Those who have been divorced have experienced great pain. None of the 12 or the First Presidency have been divorced. Copy in authors possession. Sam Finley, Duck Football: From One Mission to Another, Eugene Daily News, September 16, 2011, accessed September 16, 2011, http://eugenedailynews.com/2011/09/16/duck-football-from-one-mission-to-another. ?58, The discussion by e-mail continued back and forth between those who believed that plural marriage was a celestial principle and those who either did not believe or at least questioned whether it was indeed something that would be practiced in the Celestial Kingdom. I would think not.60, Not surprisingly, the ambivalence among even active, faithful Latter-day Saints regarding plural marriage continues. Even more tragically, accidental discovery and/or inadequate teachings about the Churchs history and relationship to plural marriage have caused crises of faith which have alienated members of the Church and, in many cases, led to their eventual departure from the faith. Valerie Hudson, A Reconciliation of Polygamy, presentation at the 2011 FAIR Conference, notes in possession of author. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. The confusion and conflict began with the secrecy and prevarication of Joseph Smith when he revealed plural marriage to a trusted circle of the Nauvoo elite.4 Plural marriage was not openly practiced until after the Saints left Illinois and were safely ensconced in the Great Basin of the western United States. I've also known several Bishopric Counselors who have been divorced. i was having a discussion with a friend and he said one of the 12 apostles of the LDS church had been divorced, i told him from what i know about the LDS church i did not think that was true but not being a member of the LDS i would try to find out if that was true, can anyone confirm or deny this ? Craig L. Foster, Like Two Crazy Aunts in the Attic: Latter-day Saints and Popular Polygamy Stereotypes, Foundation for Apologetic Information and Research, accessed January 20, 2014, http://www.fairmormon.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/2010-Craig-Foster.pdf. At the very least, it might help dispel the popular [Page 73]perception that plural marriage revolved around sexualityand not only sexuality, but the dominance of male sexuality. Just do your best. Dr. Swinton says, [In Church culture], divorce is a bit of a taboo issue that many don't know how to deal with, so the result is to avoid.However, avoiding divorced members only adds to their troubles. That would be incorrect, divorced men can be bishops. When I suggested to a volunteer at Church Hosting that we take the guests to the Beehive House, she immediately said, Oh you dont want to do that., I asked why not and she gave a nervous laugh and said, Well, you know., She gave another nervous laugh and repeated, You know. She continued, They might ask questions.. FHE Object Lesson: Treasure Transformation, Remembering President Boyd K. Packer (19242015). Michael Brissenden, The Mormon Moment, ABC.net, October 18, 2011, accessed October 19, 2011, http://www.abc.net.au/foreign/content/2011/s3342583.htm. As interesting as the survey statistics were, the most fascinating parts of the survey data were the respondent comments. For examples of people who chose to secretly practice plural marriage while still members of the LDS Church, see Craig L. Foster, The Persistence of Plural Marriage Within Mainstream Mormonism: The Example of the Barr and Mary Musser Family, in Scattering of the Saints: Schism Within Mormonism, eds. The time or times of such sacred education needs a little more explanation. Thats just how it is.62. i was having a discussion with a friend and he said one of the 12 apostles of the LDS church had been divorced, i told him from what i know about t Dianne Chryst Ormond, It Started with Science, MormonThink.com, 2006, accessed October 15, 2011, http://mormonthink.com/itstartedwithscience.htm. Eternal plural marriage would be in the future, and, for some Latter-day Saint women, that makes it a very dark future. John Kitzmiller, personal interview, October 13, 2011. [They] could have helped me realize that there is more to being a member of the Church [than] being in a traditional families are forever kind of family., [Acknowledge] me as a person. Your Feelings About Mormon Polygamy., 43. For more information on the Van Dusens, see Craig L. Foster, From Temple Mormon to Anti-Mormon: The Ambivalent Odyssey of Increase Van Dusen Dialogue 27/3 (1994): 27586. Elder DallinH. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Divorce, Ensign, May 2007, 71. A 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. They likely dont know what to do or say. They were similar to statements that I have heard and read in other settings and reflect a combination of discomfort, embarrassment, and ignorance regarding plural marriage. [Page 71]. One faithful Latter-day Saint wrote of his in-laws learning of Joseph Smiths polyandry, My [Page 63]mother-in-laws eyes bulged out.44 One woman who found out about Smiths polyandrous marriages, combined with other issues regarding Joseph Smith and Mormonism, declared she was done, done and DONE!! To [Page 65]be fair, in the RS lesson this declaration evoked criticism and debate of a kind not often seen in RS.51. Some members of the LDS Church have expressed shock and puzzlement that early Church leaders such as Joseph Smith and Brigham Young would lie about plural marriages before the public announcement of the doctrine and practice. Missionaries should learn more about the history of plural marriage and then mention this in a faithful way before converts baptisms. He did, however, not require any other members to practice the doctrine until the Nauvoo period. Copy in possession of the author. Because of this widespread apostasy, the Lord withdrew the authority of the priesthood from the earth. Often times in our anxiety to live Gods commandments, we focus on everything we should avoid to remain righteous. If my parents were sealed in the temple and then got divorced, which one am I sealed to? This brings up another matter that needs to be addressed: missionaries at Church historical sites must be taught how to discuss the topic of Mormon polygamy because it is inevitable it will be brought up by curious visitors. Given the lack of available information from official sources, it isnt surprising that members like this woman would believe Brigham Young was the prophet who introduced plural marriage. Copy in authors possession. but we called it celestial marriage (Salt Lake City: Signature Books, 2008); and Richard S. Van Wagoner, Mormon Polygamy: A History (Salt Lake City: Signature Books, 1986). For the very first time, I am seeing outright no in response to will there be celestial polygamy. The Church, of course, has no jurisdiction whatever in this matter.26, LDS Apostle M. Russell Ballard stated in a Semiannual General Conference session, Let me state clearly that no polygamist group, including those calling themselves Fundamentalist Mormons or other derivatives of our name, have any affiliation whatsoever with The Church of Jesus Christ [Page 56]of Latter-day Saints.27 LDS Apostle Jeffrey R. Holland was even more outspoken in referencing the fundamentalists, We havent practiced polygamy for over a centuryand its a little frustrating to have these fundamentalist groups resurface.28, Discomfort about the Churchs polygamous past is particularly noticeable in Church-produced literature and at Church-owned historical sites. Im a Mormon, I know it, I live it and I love it. If you are divorced, here are some ways to stay close to your children and strong in the gospel. . Divorce was more prevalent in the early Church. There should, then, be a better historical and doctrinal explanation of plural marriage in adult Gospel Doctrine classes. Elder David S. Baxter, a general authority of the Seventy, found the gospel at a critical time in his life. Another active Latter-day Saint responded: Are you suggesting that what is making you pleased is the denial of relationships in the Celestial Kingdom? With his father serving as asoldier in the war, President Uchtdorf's mother was left alone to transport her four children via a refugee train heading west to Germany during the winter. I think being cool matters too much to me. Even so, 12 other countries were represented, most from European countries.34, Over 47% of survey respondents heard about polygamy as a child while another 39% heard about it as teenagers, for a total of over 86% learning about plural marriage while in their childhood or youth. Indeed, some even try to dress like 19th-century Mormons, except in neo-pioneer style pastel dresses topped off with a bizarre hairstyle. In their examination of the divorce rate within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, using both civil and temple marriages combined, McClendon and Chadwick (2005) estimated that the current lifetime divorce rate for returned-missionary men to be approximately 12% and for returned-missionary women around 16%. Divorced male members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are now required to obtain permission from the First Presidency before being sealed to a second wife. I don't know if divorced men can be branch presidents though. When children spend most of their time with their mother, it is easy for the father to feel like he has become a visitor to his own children. Divorce can be an ugly, painful experience that leaves all involved angry, confused, and embarrassed. The place is easya Church setting in which accurate information may be taught in programs such as Primary, Sunday School, and Seminary. DallinH. Oaks, Divorce, Ensign, May 2007, 70. We know that some look back on their divorces with regret at their own partial or predominant fault in the breakup. For example, one active Latter-day Saint in a private e-mail group opined about possible similarities between Smith and Jeffs, None of this eases the nagging feeling in the back of the brain that somehow Warren Jeffs is a 21st-century Joseph Smith.47 This same member had previously written, I can see [Page 64]how the Jeffs case really could be a problem for some. For some of our youth, the shock is too traumatic for their tender testimonies. WebIn their examination of the divorce rate within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, using both civil and temple marriages combined, McClendon and Chadwick "The train stopped, my mother went out and tried to get food," President Uchtdorf told KUTV. My goal now is to do all I can to remain faithful to Christ, build a strong new marriage, and be as good a model to my children and stepchildren as I can.. They just wanted to help., Member friends primarily provided support around the spiritual connection that could not be found with non-members. It should be noted that while most of the sanctioned post-Manifesto plural marriages were performed outside of the United States, some were performed within U.S. borders. .I apologize. Foster, Like Two Crazy Aunts in the Attic.. A couple of years ago, I was talking with one of my daughters 16-year-old friends, a descendant of LDS polygamists, and mentioned Joseph Smiths plural wives. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Anti-Mormons are constantly pushing and picking at members faith in order to plant seeds of doubt and to destroy members testimonies. There were 400 respondents, with a little over half being male. If only married And modern Bible translations NIV, ESV, and CSB do not translate Malachi 2:16 as God saying I hate divorce. What percent of marriages end in divorce? Divorce disqualifies a Priesthood holder from even being a Bishop, let alone a General Authority. It is not part of my testimony of the Church.49 Another respondent referred to the idea that plural marriage would extend into the eternities as nothing more than folk belief, which is very distressing, especially to women of faith, and many individuals of LDS background have left the Church over this and similar issues.50, In July 2011, Mormon author and blogger Jana Riess wrote about an e-mail she had received from a former Latter-day Saint woman who had eventually left the Church over several issues, including the persistence of polygamous theology among Mormons. Riess went on to explain, As for individual belief, Ive occasionally heard it taught from the pulpit (and Relief Societys lace-draped table) that heaven will be polygamous. For example, several years ago the priesthood/Relief Society manual on the teachings of Brigham Young included a timeline of significant dates in his life, including his first marriage and his second monogamist marriage after the death of his first wife. BoydK. Packer, The Shield of Faith, Ensign, May 1995, 8. TRUTH: Scripture shows that God gives permission for divorce. The LDS believe: After the deaths of the Savior and His Apostles, men corrupted the principles of the gospel and made unauthorized changes in Church organization and priesthood ordinances. E-mail correspondence between [anonymous] and Craig L. Foster, August 13, 2011. Relationships are really difficult. Interpretation 2 seems to be the strongest, primarily because Scripture allows for divorce in exceptional circumstances (Matthew 19:9; 1 Corinthians 7:1216). Conference Poster: The Generosity and Mercy of God, If my parents were sealed in the temple and then got divorced, which one am I sealed to? New Era, August 2015, 41. The historical record, however, clearly demonstrates that Church leaders intended at least a few plural marriages to continue without the Churchs public sanction and encouragement.2 This contributed to the difficulties of the next few decades. You'll also like: What (and What Not) to Say to the Recently Divorced, Dr. Swinton agrees. A whole lesson about Doctrine and Covenants 132 and not one mention of plural marriage? Before his 13th birthday, Elder Baxter was baptized and received the Aaronic priesthood. Almost any discussion of the subject seems to be discouraged through a lack of mention in the manuals and public presentations. Through prayer and a very powerful dream she experienced, she no longer worried about it all.37 [Page 60]Unfortunately, many members are not reconciled to aspects of plural marriage. Interpreter Foundation is not owned, controlled by or affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It was a journey that almost ended in disaster. Since the time of the Manifesto, there has been suspicion that Latter-day Saints still practice plural marriage.15 Rumors and stereotyping of secret Mormon polygamous marriages have continued to the present, as news commentators and political pundits alike misconstrue and misrepresent LDS history and doctrine. Stephen C. Taysom, A Uniform and Common Recollection: Joseph Smiths Legacy, Polygamy, and the Creation of Mormon Public Memory, 1852 2002, Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought 35/3 (Fall 2002): 136. I felt like I was contagious, and I think that they thought I was!, Church is a family-orientated organization, and when your family splits, it is difficult to find your place., A simple smile or hello . Not surprisingly, many members have believed these unfortunate and mostly false accusations and stereotyping, in no small part because some historians have repeated and embraced them uncritically.8, Joseph Smiths involvement in so-called polyandrous marriages added to the image of him as a man with unbridled lust. After all, both the LDS Church and Fundamentalist Mormons share common roots and attributes. Many survey respondents noted that they felt most accepted and supported by nonmembers because they were not judgmental and there is less of a stigma around divorce in the outside world. This is particularly true if they have been faithful in Church activity and have prayed fervently for a resolution to marital problems. E-mail correspondence between [anonymous] and Craig L. Foster, August 7, 2012. We then have a duty to root out these cultural misinterpretations from our midst, lest they cause great spiritual mischief.55, Echoing the thought that belief in plural marriage as an eternal principle should be rooted out among Latter-day Saints were several faithful Latter-day Saints who actively discuss Church doctrine and history. He currently serves as the Ward Mission Leader of the Annapolis Maryland Ward. Yet continuing Church activity exposes us to correct principles and surrounds us with caring people. But for me, the most important revelation in this long ignored manuscript has to do with a foiled plot on Jesus and Mary the Magdalene's lives, about 13 years before the crucifixion. WebFor Latter-day Saint children of divorce, questions like this can add to the sadness and uncertainty that divorce brings. The Church has done a good job of differentiating itself from its Fundamentalist relatives, particularly with renegade groups like the FLDS, who have exemplified the fact that while there are similarities, there are many more differences. As the discussion grew heated, one group member observed in a private e-mail to another, Most of those who did not agree with the reinterpretation of whether or not plural marriagewill be practiced in the Celestial Kingdomhave been hammered into submissive silence by louder voices and the powers that be.59 Near the end of the online discussion, one of the men answered a woman who adamantly expressed her belief that plural marriage would not be a requirement or even a possibility in the celestial kingdom. Teenage wives. Enter your email to receive updates on our LDS Living content, 2022 LDS Living A Division of Deseret Book Company, How to Talk to Children About Temple Covenants After a Divorce, What (and What Not) to Say to the Recently Divorced, 10 Things Latter-day Saint Singles Wish You Knew, 6 Things Every Latter-day Saint with Divorced Parents Should Understand. There is more of a stigma associated with it. By addressing difficult aspects of Church history like plural marriage in their childhood and youth, eventually an understanding of the historical practice of plural marriages would be commonplace among active adult members of the Church. Here are some suggestions that might help members avoid the potential negative impact of the Churchs plural marriage heritage.63 Members need to be taught the full history of the Church, including plural marriage from Joseph Smith into the 20th century. Members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints can get divorced. The Church and its defenders have begun to take steps to inoculate members against the insidious attacks of critics and enemies. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Third Hour Forum Rules - Please be familiar with these rules before posting. If two men are available to be bishop and they are equally qualified in every way except one man is married and the other is not, you can expect the married man to receive the call. 58. "I was blessed with an extraordinary mother, Elder Oaks says. ok if you have any links or info that i can show this person i would like to see them and thanks for confirming what i thought. For a more detailed discussion of anti-Mormon accusations and stereotyping, see Craig L. Foster, Victorian Pornographic Imagery in Anti-Mormon Literature, Journal of Mormon History 19/1 (Spring 1993): 11532; Old Themes and Stereotypes Never Die: The Unchanging Ways of Anti-Mormons, FAIR, 2003, accessed October 14, 2011, http://www.fairlds.org/FAIR_Conferences/2003_Unchanging_Ways_of_Anti-Mormons.html, and Craig L. Foster, Penny Tracts and Polemics: A Critical Analysis of Anti-Mormon Pamphleteering in Great Britain, 18371860 (Salt Lake City: Signature Books, 2003). Most definitely not true. For examples of Mormon polygamy defining western polygamy, see Jessica Ravitz, Sister Wives explained: A fundamentalist Mormon polygamy primer, CNN Belief Blog, October 25, 2010, (accessed February 22, 2014); http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/10/25/sister-wives-explained-a-fundamentalist-mormon-polygamy-primer/; Michael E. Price, Are People Naturally Polygamous? Psychology Today, August 18, 2011, http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/darwin-eternity/201108/are-people-naturally-polygamous-0 (accessed February 22, 2014); and W.W., Polygamy Now! The Economist, June 28, 2013, (accessed February 22, 2014), http://www.economist.com/blogs/democracyinamerica/2013/06/slippery-slopes.
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